The Promise

Remember when we made mud pies

from the sand

we walked, skipped, and ran

pretending

I was you and you were I

Oh! how we laughed

with sparkles in our eyes

thinking........ it would always be the same

life...... was a make believe game.

But the sands of time

unfolded a different line

God took you away

through that invisible door

to be with him forever more

the pain...... was so great

I thought surly...... my heart would break.

Then in my sorrow one day

I heard our Lord

whisper my name and say

dry your tears

and ease your fears

for you..... shall join him

with me...... someday.

The Living War

Life or death which will I choose

do I win or do I  loose

that vital spark

sometimes looks to dark

eternal rest

maybe that's for the best

my spirit can't endure anymore

until it gets to that final door

then the soul becomes inflamed

knowing it wasn't to blame

gasping a tiny breath

the mind slowly

releases the thought of death

the greatest battle of all

a debate

fought behind a crumbling brick wall

there's no gun or any weapon

no blood is visually being shed

for this conflict

rages deep inside my head.

Past and Future

The child.... was twelve or so

with long greasy hair

falling over tightly held shoulders

wearing a baggy shirt and

dirty scuffed up jeans

staring with hatred in her eyes

and defiance on her face.

Another.... a little older

with stooped shoulders and

lines between her brows

caring bags of pain

under tired sleepless eyes.

Past and future....screaming at each other

the child with hatred

the woman with pain

I knew they were the same

and both carried my name.

The Broken Baby Dolls

The four year old stands

beside her mommy's bedroom door

shaking with fear

tears spilling from her eyes

streaking the dirt on her hollow cheeks

she feels the burning stings

as she watches the blood

flow down her legs from all the scratches

remembering her mommy screaming

"You little brat! All you ever do is make messes

Mommy I fell off the chair

My favorite bowl broken and glass every where

Mommy can I have some more meat

Get out of here  you don't deserve to eat."

Knowing her mommy would be mad if she woke her

the little girl tip toes away

standing beside her bed

she looks down at the baby doll laying there

it was all broken

one eye missing the other wouldn't open

it's forehead smashed  one hand chewed

and one of its legs was gone

with rage on her face

she grabs the doll and throws it against the wall

over and over again

screaming

"you don't deserve to eat ! All you ever do is make messes."

breathing hard

she picks the doll up from the floor

with tears and sweat pouring from her body

making the filthy dress stick to her hot skin

she throws the doll once again

she sits on the dirty wooden floor

holding her baby doll close to her heart

rocking back and forth

shedding tears of pain

gently lying down

with thumb in her mouth snuggled up to her mangled baby doll

she cries herself to sleep

with nothing to eat.

The Place 

It's a place

where there is no leering eyes

or evil people

giving you chase.

It's a place

where you hide

so those

who'll hurt you

can't find a trace.

It's a place

where you go

when you think it can show

and everyone

will see the shame

on your face.

It's a place

where you cry

when no one cares

they've spoiled

your beautiful grace.

It's a place

where there is no haste

to peep out

you know

no one cares

about the waste.

It's a place

if you come out

there's so much pain

you'll want to go

to that safe space.

It's a place

that's safe

the only one at all

behind

your built up wall

I'll rest my case.